I miss you.
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Friday Night, a man on uncrowded street corner a few blocks south of Santa Monica Blvd. has a boombox and is dancing In Front Of The Mirror style. Was he looking for an audience, or did he just feel like expressing himself? I didn’t see a tip jar. Maybe he was practicing his routine and working up the nerve to perform on the Third Street Promenade?

Sunday Morning on Santa Monica Blvd: a man on a beach cruiser, riding down the street, shirtless, with his tongue hanging out of his mouth just like The Dog.

There was a networking mixer shin-dig at That Guy’s office. Several hundred people from all over L.A. show up, after work, to mingle and impress. Everyone had a preprinted name badge with titles like “Programmer,” “Marketing Intern,” and “Software Engineer” on their 6:00 duds. Except for two guys who look and smell like The Day After A Frat Party. Maybe they showered and shaved sometime this week. These two were your typical college campus staples. Their name badges said that they were CEO of Somesuch.

While I was walking The Dog down Santa Monica Blvd., I walked past a small house with a clean, new, not-weathered Christmas wreath hanging from a gate, on the last day of June(?). Christmas in July, anyone?

So, today I got a wild hair to send some cookies to Canada. I really should have gone to the store, bought some cookies, and proceeded directly to the post office. But I’m cheap. And I’m home alone.

I had a request for Peanut Butter cookies, so The Dog and I hopped in the car to get a jar of PB from the store. That Guy I Married and I argue about the legitimacy of peanut butter that you do, or do not have to mix before you eat it. I like the real peanut butter, the kind that you have to blend together. It was a big jar, and I’m pregnant (see: lazy) so I got out the egg beater to blend the peanut butter. Yes. Yes I did…
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We had an uneventful prenatal visit today, That Guy came with me, hoping there was a chance for an ultrasound. No luck, same ole checkup appointment. I drank the nasty glucose soda, went in bathroom to give sample, we heard the heartbeat, the midwife asked .068 questions, I had had blood drawn. Baby did punch the dopler thingy a couple of times. ::Pow:: ::Blam::

Since the prenatal visit was uneventful, I was working on a rather dull Ten on Tuesday post, and reading my RSS feeds (how come everybody else gets to take home digital copies of their ultrasounds in the second trimester? “Maybe” I might get another ultrasound later. Fooey!).

This morning, I offered to send cookies to a blogger who’s having a Very Bad Day. She told me her preference, and then I remembered. Shoot!? She’s in Canada, can I send cookies through customs? So I fired off an instant message to ask That (Canadian) Guy I Married.

Me: How hard is it to send cookies through customs to Canada?
T(C)GIM: not hard, just make sure you pack them well
Me: no problems in customs?
T(C)GIM: and mark on the customs form that the package contains cookies
T(C)GIM: shouldn’t be unless you’re making real susan b anthony brownies or whatever they’re called ;o)
Me: how long does it take? 10 days?
T(C)GIM: depends how you ship them
Me: ROFL.
T(C)GIM: might take a week or less
Me: DO YOU MEAN ALICE B. TOKLAS BROWNIES?
Me: seriously?
T(C)GIM: i knew there was a B. initial in there somewhere ;o)
Me: OMG. I’m so blogging this!

To give him credit, he’s a nice little Church Boy, and he didn’t go to school in the states, so he’s not up on the history of U.S. slavery, women’s sufferage, and Pot Brownies.

And, just in case you landed here from some questionable Google search term; No, I will NOT mail you hash cakes. Sheesh!

::Crickets Chirping:: I still don’t know what to do about the trip plans for summer. Travel? Don’t travel? Anyone, Anyone? Bueller?

Should I camp out in front of The Big Baby Superstore and interview mothers on the street? Arg. If we’re going to cancel, I need to do it soon.

I got asked for an About page, so here’s one: they’re sort of hard, and sort of fun to write. Enjoy.

Dear Baby,
The little fluttering kicking thing. It was cute for the first two weeks, and now it just plain hurts. Please chill out.
Love, Mama.

Dear Feet,
Please stop swelling. K? Thanks.
Love, The other body parts that need to get out of here once in a while.

Dear Dog,
It’s too darn hot to walk you. Please acquiesce. Or go talk to Number 1, and ask him to walk you.
Love, The hand that feeds you.

Dear Los Angeles,
It’s too hot. Stop it. Also, Google says that there are no smoothie shops in town, please fix that. Buying fruit and using a blender is too much work.
Love, The Suburbanite.

Dear Self,
Suck it up and stop whining. Turn off Tivo and do something with your weekend.
Love, Me.

Right after I got pregnant we got a good deal on a pair of Disneyland tickets, two weekend trips to Las Vegas, and a four-day Broadway theater package at a scholarship auction.

So. Traveling while pregnant. I need help.

Things to know;

Right now I’m 24 weeks pregnant (5.5 months), I’m sorta kinda showing a little.
Due first week in October.
I’m gonna be pregnant all of the darn hot summer.

DISNEYLAND:
We live one hour away from Disneyland.
I’m still okay to walk up to 4 miles a day.
School just got out, there may be people everywhere.
A coworker pointed out to my husband that pregnant women can’t go on rides.

Can’t? Shouldn’t? Will not be allowed on? Are advised against? The Disneyland website says that “Expectant mothers should not ride” the Matterhorn, Big Thunder Mountain, Space Mountain, Splash Mountain, or Indiana Jones; basically any of the fun stuff.
Are the ride operators seriously going to pull me out of line?

I suppose we could make a day out of riding the Tea Cups, Pirates of the Caribbean, and the Haunted House.

LAS VEGAS:
We’d spend the gas money to drive from L.A. to Vegas, but we have hotel vouchers. I’d like to stop at Calico Ghost Town, hit the state line outlet stores to see if there are any good deals, shop for baby clothes, hang out in nice pools, get pampered a little with a pedicure or maybe a massage, and drool at the M&M store. I can’t drink, I don’t need to gamble, and we don’t really have the budget to see any more shows.

Am I nuts for even considering walking around Vegas in July while 6 months pregnant?

NEW YORK:
We *just* got this Broadway trip package in the mail (we paid for it in February). We got vouchers for two tickets to two shows, four nights in a hotel, and coach airfare. Between the blackout dates, the hotel restrictions, and my due date, we basically have to pick whatever dates aren’t blacked out the last week in July, or the first two weeks in August. I’m hoping that there are still tickets available to good shows.

IF I can still get tickets to good shows, Am I nuts to fly from L.A. to N.Y. in coach while 7 months pregnant? Am I nuts for getting on the N.Y. subway? Is it as hot in New York as it is in L.A. in August?

Honestly? How uncomfortable is traveling while pregnant? Should I regift the Disney and Vegas tickets? Go enjoy em? Refund the New York trip? TAKE A 3-MONTH OLD BABY WITH US to all of the above in January (the tickets all expire in March 09). I’ve never had a problem with trolls before, so I’m trusting you to play nice. What are your thoughts?

When I was a kid, I was that that weirdo.

In third grade I invited three of the neighbor girls over for a dance party, and for a brief minute, I thought that they would actually dance while my dad improvised on the Casio keyboard. That went over real well.

I was the kid in the fourth grade who literally leaped and skipped out of the classroom on the last day of school actually singing several lines from “School’s Out for Summer,” while wearing my best dress and those awful velcro tennis shoes.

At my tenth birthday in fifth grade, the neighbor girls (sisters) got into another bickering match. I had to stop myself from singing “It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to.” You’d better believe I did say it.

It took me a long time to figure out that life is not a musical. Eventually, I learned to keep my mouth shut. Singing only happens on T.V. I’ve only ever met one person who would spontaneously bust out in song. I miss him. He was insane, but it was so much fun. He used to drive my brother crazy on the drive home from school.

That’s why I nearly died laughing when I saw this on Busymom’s site today:

Can we get a napkin please?

The problem with singing about it, is that it takes three minutes to actually get the napkin. But it’s so much fun!

This weekend we went shopping for Maternity Clothes: Round Two. The hair-band-attached-to-the-button-hole is no longer working for me. We picked up a pair of jeans, which fit great in the store, but they don’t. stay. up. when I walk around. These jeans are supposed to be the feature item of this store, so I don’t know what gives. Do all expecting women walk around with their pants falling down? How do I resolve this? It doesn’t help that the first time I wore them, I dropped bleach on the floor and splattered it on my pant leg. Grrr.

I needed a dress for a wedding in July. I bought a plain black “good enough” Target maternity dress for $5 at a consignment shop. It fits, and it works, but not for a summer wedding at 11:00 a.m. I found another dress for $40, and figured that will do.

Last night, the baby finally kicked hard enough for Ian to be able to feel it with his hand on my belly. The baby has taken to kicking me in the same spot at the same time every night.

We’re getting the office cleaned up to make room for baby. There’s finally enough room in here for the dog to “roll over” on command. It’s been so long since there was room for her to roll over, that she’s forgotten how to do it. The dog is a natural-born Diaper Change Alert System, does anyone have any tips for training the dog to change the diaper?

Also, Clickmom’s mother passed away yesterday, go send her some love: I bet she’d appreciate that.

DH works at a shiny new internet startup that loves to tout how there’s a scene in L.A. too, really, there is. See? We’re young and hip! He got an invite to a preview night for the uWink restaurant at Hollywood and Highland.

It’s date night, and we still haven’t figured out where to get a decent meal in L.A., so we jumped at the chance to try something new and geeky.

The restaurant doesn’t open for a few more days, and the preview night was intended to generate some hype, as well as work the bugs out of the system. I’m going to skip over the part where we had a 4:00 reservation, and we stood in line and looked in the window until 5:30. At 5:00 the staff were still up on ladders plugging in flat screens, and the waitresses were still drying wine glasses over the touch-sensitive computer on the bar. Never mind that the bartenders were playing with the visual effects on the bar instead of serving drinks at 5:00.

I’m going to skip over the part where I was starving by 6:30 when the food came, so I gracelessly scarfed down a buffalo wing. Never mind that pregnant women shouldn’t put scarfing and buffalo wing in the same sentence. I’m not going to say that uWink needs to have chewable Tums available on the menu. This sort of thing is inherent on a trial run. I’ll give them that. Just make sure you order the buffalo wings with the sauce on the side. I’m just saying.

The overall concept is pretty cute. You get a wrist band at the door, and you get seated with your party around a table with touch screens in the middle. An adorable pixie of a waitress explained that she was our Entertainment Guide(?) for the evening, and how to order food so that everything came out in the order we wanted, and we could eat at the same time as the members of our party.
Commence the screen tapping. There are soft drinks, bar drinks, appetizers, specials, build-your-own-burgers, desserts, as well as trivia games, virtual tours, group games, and screen drawing games. Our round of Roy Rogers and Shirley Temples came from the kitchen in a flash, the restaurant handled this
very well.

The ordering gets a little quarky if you want something that is not on the menu, for example, a glass of ice, or an additional side of pesto mayo. The guy next to me used the screen to order a glass of ice, and a refill, he was brought a glass of ice with a side of water. I called up a build-your-own burger (medium well, with red onions, on sourdough). I looked at the sauces available, but forgot to ask for pesto mayo. Later, I asked a waiter (or maybe he was a busboy?) to bring me a side of pesto mayo. He looked at me like I was from Mars, and brought me a side of Miracle Whip. This is the kind of thing where it’d be much easier to just ask a server, if you can catch one.

The drink menu. Let’s just say uWink makes me wish I wasn’t pregnant! Dude, those drinks looked good. Also, if you’re a cheap drunk like me, and you don’t know what to order because you don’t know whats IN every drink served in a bar… this is the place to be. The drink menu is subdivided, and you drill down the screens based on type. I hate beer, wine, vodka, and gin, so I skipped the martinis etc., and went straight for the dessert drinks. I got to read the ingredients of each one, and futz around, and noone rolled their eyes waiting for me to pick a (dream) drink. Ian was a little annoyed, he tried to order a shot of Wild Turkey, and tried to order it without the glass of Pepsi, but it came in the Pepsi anyway.

There was a table of guys with laptops, cables, and redbull huddled in one corner. At one point in the evening, the servers crashed and all the screens went blank (remember, this is a preview night). There was an audible “Awwww” across the restaurant. All of the (Mac) software reloaded quickly, and we were back in business soon. Shortly after dinner and the reboot, the waiters brought us appetizers, and then just told us to take them when we looked confused. Ten minutes later, we were brought duplicate main courses… the server(software) didn’t lose our orders, but it did reset them. I’m sure they’ll fix that before they open.

We sat with two other couples (they were only taking groups of four and six from behind us in line). One of the guys commented that this system would make for very easy inventory control inside the restaurant. Another girl in our party left without paying for her cosmo (food was free, drinks were half price for the preview). There weren’t waiters manning the tables, so I don’t think anyone at the restaurant noticed. I’m sure they’ll notice when they open.

The games were fun, and it would be easy to come to this restaurant to entertain people from several different age groups in one party. I’m sure we’ll be back with friends when the hype settles down. Especially for drinks. 20 more weeks ’til I can just pump and dump!