Dear Ducky,
Ten months old. I can’t even beileve it. Your first birthday will be here soon. All I can think is that im not ready to lose my baby.

You’re already so independent. You drink from (my) cup. You are learning to grasp finger food. You insist on carrying the T.V. remote with you around the apartment. You sound like captain Ahab. Tap-Thump, Tap-Thump.

Each day you find some way to show me that you are moine. Right now, you’ve found me in the bedroom. You’ve come to visit me, and grab at the stuff on my night table. You’re cruising the bed and grabbing at my toes.

You come and go. Barely ten monts od an you’re in and out of a room likei a teenager asking for car keys. Before I can even write this down, you’re in the living room yelling “ah-AH, ah-AH, ah-AH!”

You got sick for the first time last week. What a little bug you are! Always something new. Apparantly, when you’re sick, you need to be snuggled. You haven’t let me snuggle you since we stopped nursing. You’ll forgive me if I cough on you every once in a while?

Just one more hug before you’re off and running.

You’ll be walking soon. Too soon. You’re already climbing. You love to open drawers. Right now you’re banging on the bedroom door. Slap, slap!

“The days go by slowly, the years go by fast.”

I’m already forgetting what it was like to be pregnant. I remember the waitiong Wondering what your face would look like. Now I cant remember not knowing your face.

You have your daddy’s smile. When your dad laughs I can see your face. I want to hold onto that memory, put it in a snowglobe on my night stand.

Lately, you only eat for Daddy. You’ll gobble whole jars for him! Stinker.

You want us to hold you , but only so you can reach what you’re aiming to grab.

I want to be the support that you need. I sens that you won’t need to depend on us for much, but I want to be the kind of Dependable that you need in order to readch the life that you’re meant for.

Love, Mama.

P.S. Stop crying so that I can write you a longer letter!